Sometimes I like to and listen and observe, mainly because I like to feel people out. I will sit in a room full of people having multiple conversations amongst each other. I like to get a sense of what I’m walking into before I engage in conversation with anyone. I’m not sure why; well because I’m a bit timid. I really hate conversing with a “know it all” because quite frankly it makes you look like an asshole unless you actually have the resources to back your shit up. If not, just talk what you know and not what you’ve heard. I like to think of myself as the dumbest person in the room because I have so much space to learn and I am willing to acknowledge my ignorance. To be fair I’m not the brightest person. so when I open a dialogue like this it leaves room for discussion criticism and it creeps me out! It gives me anxiety to think I may have to respond to someone because they disagree with my opinion of “know it alls” being assholes. Let me say this, they’re only assholes if they’re not willing to listen to another person’s reasoning and completely become guarded because they think someone is being offensive. I mentioned I am a bit afraid of dialogue because I have social anxiety, don’t get me wrong I love talking with people; I love picking people’s brains. I love people! I hate confrontation! I want people to disagree with me, I just hate when I’m talking to someone and something they said is just not factual and want to argue instead of getting their facts, it grinds my damn gears. I don’t talk about anything I have no clue about, that’s ignorant. I used to feel intimidated by really smart people, but actually, I love being around them. It’s something about learning new things through conversation. Almost like you find a way to relate it to your daily life and boom! It’s engraved in my brain and I can’t wait to share this knowledge with someone else. Moral of this long ass pointless passage is; Be present in every space you occupy with an opened mind and a willingness to learn.
