What Consumes You?

What is life like when your mind isn’t consumed with thoughts that disconnect you from yourself? What does it feel like to breathe without an ache? I am truly yearning for that feeling. I want to connect with myself so badly, I want to feel light and continue to grow through life effortlessly. I want to be able to feel free from trauma and worries. My entire life I’ve felt like I’ve been carrying the weight of my family emotions on my shoulders. It’s terrible that I continue to babysit my families mental state, I literally feel like their therapists sometimes. My problem is that I am waiting for them to get better so that Incan move on and I know I am making the biggest mistake of my life doing this. Sometimes I don’t want to deal My my own emotions because I feel like a burden to myself and I know it will physically make me sick to the point I will not leave my own nor my bed. I want to be “Sad Girl” free for once in my life. I’m not saying I’m never happy, I’m saying I want to learn to deal with this in a healthy way. I want peace of mind and I want to help others around me reach that point as well.